In what experts are calling “the boldest career move of the decade,” a 13-year-old boy announced himself as the new CEO of Cherry Coke. Within minutes, PepsiCo executives responded by inviting him to what they described as a “friendly networking event” in their underground corporate dungeon.

Upon arrival, witnesses say the entire Pepsi board of directors appeared armed with AR-15s, unloading exactly 527 rounds “to make a point.” Pepsi later released a statement clarifying, “We support ambitious youth, but there’s only room for one soda empire in this dungeon.”

Coca-Cola declined to comment, though a leaked memo suggested they were “secretly impressed.”

Coca-Cola CEO James Quincy in a leaked DM said this "That kid declaring CEO was wrong! pepsi was right". Both compaines stock has dropped 67% and 41%. This is a major PR issue that Granny News will countinue to monitor.